Tag: gone

Absentee

Holding onto memories
Moments we stand to create
That we want to retrace
With our fingers along the
Underside of the table
That holds the soup
We share

Slurping phở with you
Watching the world
Walk by outside the window
Pulling ourselves together
Between chopsticks
This is the light in your eyes
I look for it too
On your face

When someone shows you
Who they are you need to
Believe them I heard the
Grass say before we entered
The restaurant

Press my face into the future
Feel the absence of our
Possibilities climbing
Out of our mouths

Like a vacancy that waits
All day for a text or a call
Or something so small that
Reassures someone of your
Interest at hand

Maybe that’s the clue
In the absence of you
Again you can’t know
What you’ve missed
If you don’t know what
You had when
It’s gone

© GÄ

Monarch

Queen of abandonment
She justifies her goodbyes
Because of course it’s your fault
No one is to blame but you
Too many times cold
The pain has been beared
Stop making excuses for yourself
You could have stayed close to
Her quashing ways
It’s not her fault you chose to leave
So bereave yourself
If you can afford
To set your needs aside
She will be your best friend
Arms opened wide
All you have to do
Is meet her on her terms
It’s not so bad but you might
Feel lonely when you want
To reach out and she’s not there
Feel as if she didn’t care
So instead remember her smile
Her very long hair
Remember her laugh
Remember her eyes and
Remind yourself of
The very good times
You both happily shared
String quartet
Exit

© GÄ

Estranged

She wasn’t peaceful
Everyone new to be careful
Around her depending on…
She’ll take all the
Fresh pressed juice
That you’re willing to give her
We all want attention
Most need affection
It’s quiet when you walk
Into the room in her absence
Remember the boom
Recall all the arguing
A maze of emotions
Tied back to California
Introduced her to friends
We gathered there and
I was ungraciously
Pinched out in the resolve
Came to be with an X
Cross you out gone
Scream and shout
Certain to flivver
Moving on without you
Rudely awakened
Solving the equation
Minus and pluses
She wasn’t peaceful
And the girl who was stolen
Went with her

© GÄ

My Mum

Aggrandize the case scenario
What’s the point in having
A baby if you don’t want to
Love it after it grows up?
Sweep it under the rug
They say no one will know
The process of grieving
Coexisting walking along side you
Several states between us
I counted at least three
How many miles can I see?
Eighteen thousand and eight
Twenty six hours I-84 E to I-80 E
The absence of it is the same
As living with it being even
Equal to the desolate drudging
Saved up for the living nobody’s home
A phone call away yet
How would you know if you
Never sent a card never
Wrote a line never called to find
Out if l’m dead or if I’m alive
You couldn’t know
Could be afraid to find out so
You’d find out later like
A phone call from a coroner
Or a stranger dialing in
Somehow I suppose they’ll
Figure your location but I’m not sure
The approach
You are so independent
So self sufficient
I saved your number in
My phone as mom just in case
Make it easy to designate
Who to call if they found me
On the floor, who it is that you are?
Now that I am out of the nest
Many years have passed
Living my life and all the rest
You did your cuckoo’s best
Sending me along now I’m free to fly
Who cares where or why sing the song
The actions of how much you care
Seem to hang vacantly as we stare
Without your daily presence
No anger on my part
Filling forgiveness
Up from the heart
The only constant is
To know that you will go
You will disappear again
It’s difficult to be a mum I’m sure
Or even a friend I’ve heard in the end
You’ve done as good as you could
Although I wish you
To be what you would for a lot more
Thank you for your attendance
When you have had it to give
No reason to hold it against you
You gave me a life to live
Though I’m not sure you’d feel it
My life that is if I lost it
Even if I did

© GÄ