red – Poétique

Psithurism

Rutilant showers of
Living red light
Sparkling undead

Is it that easy or
Is it that hard ?
Listening for the susurrus

You made me feel safe
And mushy and vulnerable
Like it was okay to talk about myself
And then you made me feel
Bad about saying it
When you said I only
Care about myself
You took it all away

I can’t talk about
Things that hurt inside
Because they hurt more
When they’re on the outside

I don’t need you to tell me
That I’m a good person

Like the squirrel
That got caught in the
Middle of the road
Emotionally mangled
Changing lives
Simply by existing
Too much pressure
Sometimes to be
Alive

I don’t need you to tell me
That I’m a good person

I already have that part
Figured out

Offhand

Jump onto a train to free myself
From my own thoughts
Listening to yours would be
Much more desirable

But still the lemon peels while
Searching for the red dots
Heart palpitations and
Remembering spots walking down
Melrose Boulevard looking for
A new pair of shoes it was then
The only thing that mattered
In that moment and making it
To the movie theater in time
To see the show before it starts
And popcorn? And lemonade

I’m not sure
If only to care about tiny things
Look down then look up
Searching for the red dots again
Turn my head and see the future
Hiding behind the couch
On a towel by the sea
Floating out of the city
Away from the traffic
Car alarms as they scream
I’ve heard birds that a sound prettier

Remember her, remember him
That was then

Let’s go there, it’s so easy
When you’re settled and have a job
To dream of a different life
Take all of that away and
You’re in a cardboard box existence
Searching for the red dots again
Electricity and a safe place
To rest the brilliant self on a bed
All the things we wanted before love
All the decisions we made to save ourselves

Grass is greener under a purple sky
Purple sky is hard to come by
I’m awake he said and at least there’s
Money in the bank

Red Birds

Monotonous tone
Tumbling drone on repeat
Is the hummingbird to my
Psychedelic central network
Emotions at my fingertips
Nerve endings systematically
Outstretched to the sky
When the grey crawls in
The blue breaks brighter
In both of my eyes
After the melancholic
Piano player slowly
Stood up from his bench
I heard the red birds fly overhead
Even though the windows
Were closed my heart
Was again opened to
Hear the sound of another
Person walking in
I recognized the waiter coming
Towards me in the arc
From far away I was uncertain
If it was her hair or her smile
Is this a church in Italy
Maybe a restaurant I’ve seen
In a magazine next to the water
Uncertain but reassured it was a dream
When I felt the edge of my blanket
Against my lips
Thirsting for destiny

Seeing Red

When the sun goes down
Is there order beneath the chaos
From the running in the streets
What knife will carve the life
Out from your neck when the
Song that is sung for our elders
Is slit from the air, ripped from
The arms and hands of the
Jewels that are our brothers
And also our sisters these are our
Grandmothers and Grandfathers
It can all be stripped away
Beyond our control, reamed
Stand up for yourself and fall
For the sake of someone else’s
Pride to be the Queen I won’t
Kneel down to lazy dreams

Particles

Okay now I know
Not you not him not me
Not a dead grass field
Or tranquil salty sea
Kiss my forehead
Leave the traces
Of lips red
So others can behold
Your wanted love for me
Words slip out each side
Both corners of my mouth
Do they not say
How much I’ve loved thee
Or how long I’ve been
Accustomed to the
Howling gnashing tracks
Beg for forgiveness
On my knees
Do the genetics of the deep
Fanciful lesser traveled
Oceans grounds breed rocks
That can cure and heal
The troubles of a mind
Wrought with the sunburned
Lightless self impeded kind
Nor even in the light of day
Did lavender find a way
To live without the water
Necessary to turn the nose
Of each and every single one
It passeth by but I
Do now know it’s okay
Him not me not you
Nor horse chomping at the bit
Lest the fields be turned to flames
My fire starter tending embers
I should only ask to tattoo
What is left of what is red
Upon my head from
The havoc your sweet lips
Wreaked upon my heart

In Red

I’ve been keeping myself
For you for that moment
A beautiful fantasy really
Tracing the light along your skin
With my finger on the arch
Of your romanticism
I dreamt up when I was
Wrapping up your encouragement
Into the perfect purse I could
Carry with me without
Anyone knowing
Anyone knowing about you
Anyone knowing about us
Meeting soon when midnight
Waits for hours after dusk
Lusting for your shadow
Like writing the initials
Of my lovers letters
Unknown yet or
Carving them into the tree
That I have pictured you beneath
So senselessly in red