love – Poétique

Flowerbed

Broken-hearted
Or is it broken departed
Too many no’s at one time
Loving in the fantasy
Of my mind
Resting in the shade
Of the bower of your heart
My incendiary flowerbed
We knew all of this before
Collectively we just
Never learned it
Enthralled
Feeling every feeling
Every sensation
Every pore
All the channels
Super loaded
Flooded and exploded
In my body
Somber notes
To coax your heart and arms
Around me
Lay down in the bower
Of this incendiary flowerbed
A hammock
A small town fabric
Of undoubted love

So Many Birds

Knowing you were there
Missing where we were
That night
Your hair
The moment that didn’t know
How to kiss me back
Jumping up and down
The laughter all around
I’ve never heard
So many birds chirping
We danced and
Someone’s wedding bells
Were ringing and clanging
In the backyard
Of my heart
One tiny moment
In space and time
It feels like all we get
Even if we gave a lot
I just wanted to absorb you
Stand back and let you shine
Watch you do your best
Blinding light
Love unlike the rest
Love unlike the rest
Love unlike…

Supernatural

Of course I would
Fall in love with a ghost
Of course I would
Miss my window of opportunity
I could retrace my acts
Sixteen days later
And still not find your footsteps
Kind of remarkable
Kind of like moss
Always there but maybe
Just in the background
And we miss it because
We’re not looking for it
I certainly wasn’t looking for you
But somehow my eyes found
What the heart wants
When I looked at you
Of course I would
Not realize it would be too late
Of course I would
Think about you endlessly
Through the night
I went back there today
Again because I also
Didn’t forget about the way
You came running out the door
After me
Of course I would
Ask you about plants
Of course I would
Wish I said something else
Of course I would
Never see you again
Of course I would
Fall in love with a ghost

I Was…

Hoping that I’d find you today
To give you a small note
I was hoping I could ask you
If you want to spend time
With me tomorrow
I could already taste
Your kisses
I already imagined
You would want to leave
Your mark on me
A love bruise on my neck
I had to ask you to stop
To pull away
To keep my image professional
Although I really didn’t want to
I hoped to say to you today
Everyday I say maybe tomorrow
But today is the day I say
I found you
You’re hard to catch
But unexpectedly easy
To find at first
Looking up into your eyes
Passing by
I saw you
You came and found me
And then you were gone
Where were my words
Why am I bad at this
I wasn’t looking for it
But now I’m thinking of it
I was hoping that
I’d find you today

A Good Man

I just wanted to be
A good man
Hard working
To have someone
Love me like that
Look upon me fondly
Lean into me
So that others could
See that love
Our love
But she wanted to
Compete
With everything
Is there also even
A competitor title
To be loved
To be the better lover
Without being there
To love you at all
I just wanted to be
A good man
And to be loved
But she couldn’t
Love me
She was too busy
Being the loudest one
In the room
The brightest star
Now I know
She wasn’t capable
At all

Salt

True love never dies
How could it when
You’re so entrancing
I find myself cowering
Like a flower from
A sunbeam that is boiling
Frantic not to blindfold
Myself from your light
In an open all night church
On my knees asking
The universe to make a way
Acrimoniously without
All the pieces I had dreamt
Of disintegrating
Like sweet sugar on
Your flush hot skin
Smooth like amber
On my tongue
You can’t be genuine
If you’re not and I
Surmise that you are
Beyond belief
Abracadabra
Oracular a magician
Of sorts that stirs a
Fire in me belly
With your wand
Lighting the undergird
Of my spirit with a
Fortitude that beholds the
Salt of your earth

About That

Would it be that
They should control
The meaningless things
To make us feel disempowered
Would it be that
Freakishly they could
See beneath the skirt
Of that identity
Figuratively
Observing our truths
Negate all the more
Important things
Reveal and expose
My vulnerabilities
The value of said
Credibilities crushed
Never acknowledging
What counts
Like the garden
Of my heart
Holding my hand
Kissing my face
Instead swiping
Left, right,
And all over the place
Poking at
The superficial
All the ridiculous
Unnecessary casting
Box checking satisfactions
There is
Nothing remarkable
About that

New

This isn’t reversible
Lover beware
Broken in so many places
Try not to stare
At my vulnerabilities
Callousness despair
Inhibit your cruelty
When you take down your hair
Find a new way to scout
To shout out
About yourself
Don’t take away my birthday
Just out of curiosity
Did someone neglect you
Forget to protect you
We will no longer need to
Pretend that you care
Wish for what we cannot be
I am dancing in my liberty
No longer detest that I’m invading
You when I call
Don’t have to think about it
At all
Boundaries
Fuck the boundaries
I’m ready to meet somebody new
And uncover a mountain of love
Uncover a mountain of truth
With me would you
If you care for love
If you care for intimacy
Heart shattering ecstasy
Position yourself
In close proximity to my energy
Remembering please
Allegations of interest are waisted
In ambivalent spaces

This Love

Love is there to uplift you
Empower you and console you
I cannot ever love you too much
Although some people do not have the
Capacity to love enough
Are you afraid to feel my love?
If we sit by the fire
Would we be in it?
If the table was long
Would we sit next to one another
Or at opposite ends?
I was listening to
An inner nocturnal wail
That reluctantly climbed up
From within my deepest insides
Questioning what love
Could be made of
If one could blurt it out
What love could be fought for
If one would fight no doubt
If were it not for the shame
That came of not sharpening
The blade keenly enough
To cut through the difference
For love is not war
But worth fighting for

Letters

Looking over our letters
Over my shouldered attempts
To make things better
I asked for tenderness
I cried for the loss of us
Even when we were together
I misunderstood your capacity
To love me hard enough
As hard as someone should
As hard as someone would
If they didn’t want to lose you
If they didn’t want to lose me
No mystique
No smoke and mirrors
No hidden cameras
Just open love
An opening for love
Looking over our letters
It really never got better
And so we found a way
To go our own directions
Although I miss the person
That I thought you were
When I cried for the loss of us
I realized whom
You were before
Didn’t really live there
Anymore