Heartattacking

Standing in the midst of
What I thought might be
The most epically beautiful
Poise to the existence of
Unlocking the code to love
I found myself stomped on by
An agression and entitlement
Of a passerby an unknown
A human who probably
Needed love the most and
In that moment of standing
In a shower of his spit
And fear and rage I found
Myself exclaiming that I was
Only trying to save his life
And yet his own intentions
Of provoking whatever is the
Opposite of love be it anger
Or something stronger
I felt myself in shock as if
I could not be more
Challenged by the universe
To express love in true
Composure completely
In a way that says I am
Looking out for you
So many people might
Lose their lives if we
Don’t speak up for
How important it is to
Value one another
Drained and steamrolled
As I was after such a
Horrible confrontation
I felt so alone asking if there
Was no one that could understand
How vulnerable I felt to
Opening the door to
Universal love and being
Shouted at in such a way
That could tell me to
Believe it didn’t exist
But there was truly
Nothing in me that was
Willing to accept any
Possibility that the only
Reason for my existence
Would be trampled and
Smothered out by the
Likes of someone who
Absolutely didn’t know me
Or could not see my
Desire to encourage
What we are surely left with
Only emptiness and
A desire to know
What love can actually be
If only I could
Imbue it upon you
With less than words
Vacant touch
Push through those
Dark sunglasses
Like a frequency to say
If it’s worth dying for
It’s worth loving for

© GÄ

Validation

Someone to celebrate the wins with
Someone to celebrate the sins with ha!

Best I can do is to laugh with you
Give you the benefit of the doubt
That you will pay me back later
Expecting nothing in return

Meandering through belongings
Determining what’s important
Versus what has no value
I stumbled upon my vulnerability

It was unrecognizable
Ultimately because I grafted no surety
Upon its face or scent
As if I’d never seen it before
Everyone knows it’s there
Buy many are unaware of how
It exists

She said:

Dialectic
Inconsistency is destabilizing
Back and forth houses
Can extinguish
Cheerleaders praise
Feeling special or cherished
Feast or famine
What is the reality of this?
And the confusion of that?

Home
Didn’t provide that feeling of safety
It created a fault line {in me}

You know
Love languages are formed
By what you did or didn’t get
Everybody has that

Rely on yourself

To what degree do you feel comfortable
Giving yourself that validation

It’s a steep question
I’m not sure I know what validation
Means now

I’ll get back to you

© GÄ

Get Up

Get up off the ground
Don’t make me drag you around
One way or the other
You’re coming with me
Get up off the ground
Love me or hate me

You will never forget me
But I hope that you will love me and say
Thank you for being my grace
Thank you for loving my face

At the end of the tunnel
There is a light
I know it looks really bright
But there is actually darkness on
The other side

Trust me even when your blinded
By this unpredictable life
I will not leave you behind
I am your castle I am your rock
In these sands of time
I am yours and you are mine

Everything will fade away someday
But I will be here anyway
The earth moves things around
Unsettles the ground we pave
Reminding us that we can’t
All be happy at the same time

I am always here for you

© GÄ