Geino Äotsch

Promises

Have you ever made a promise
That was only a dream?
Imaginations that we wish
Would come true and in that moment
You are swept away with an
Impossible possibility to conceive
I tend to sink very deeply
Into people mostly all the way
There isn’t a lot that I don’t
Feel comfortable getting in or
Close to even if it means
All the work will disappear
From beginning to know you
From vulnerability and fear
If it’s a fantasy of promises
Then let it be like science fiction
To both of us because to be close
You have to actually be there
Not just standing at the edge
Of the water throwing a bottle
With a message hoping it will
Arrive at its destination or even
Into the hands of your beloved
Sometimes a promise is a dream
If not to purée our feelings and
Drink them we must feel them
Out loud even if they cannot
Become true in the end
Imagination how silly
To go around smelling
Daffodils and lilies
Oh how I wish

Riddle

Morning greets us as
The moon retreats us
Never a dull moment
Looking down on earth
Waxing and waning
Painting the night sky
With light like a
Luminescent brush on
The backsides of mountains
The underbrush in the
Forest and the tips
Of our noses
Each melody that
Repeats in my head
At dawn is a different
Song narrating a unique story
That is replaying recorded
Lyrics of therapeutic
Thoughts of which to
Guide the subconscious
Eaves and waves
Tapering throughout the
Day a little reckoning
Of what has been happening
While sleeping deeply
And a message to soothe
What is to come in a lullabyic
Process and response to
A world that is resounding
To our existence with still
Miniscule bits or clues
For destiny to go on
If the asteroids ever hit
Perhaps the trees
Will witness it
It’s still unclear if
We will ever solve
The ultimate riddle

Coupling

Smart people can
Arrive at their own
Conclusions if you will
What is this trickery to be had?
Look let’s be honest
I’m not even sure
That you like me
The beasts have been
Unleashed and
We are running through
A darkened wood
Can you hear the howl
Of the wolves that
Cry to be close
To your throat
And would you offer it?
Give it up to be
Hanging free from
The invisible domain
Of shattered dreams
Broken memories and
The mysterious mist
Of uncommon truth
If I’m wrong then
Someone send a
Harbinger to
Check in on me
Follow the shape
Of the wind
Listen to the sound
Of the distant rhythm
Silent wings
Birds hiding in the trees
Lips whispering
Hopes unseen stab
Aimlessly at the dark
In an effort to strike a
Balance with me in the
Absence of light a thornless
Bed of roses spread out
The heart has lain down
With the courageous embrace
In a coupling of tomorrow
Beneath a mossy blanket

Fault

It still feels like
It’s my fault
There’s no coming back
From the loss of a loved one
Just moving forward
Sitting at the edge
Of my bed
Not in any way
Purposely thinking back
A trigger a shot
There you are
Something climbs into
My head to remind me
Of the things that we did
When we were kids
Was it something I touched?
I can’t remember what
Tripped it but the sound
Of your memory
The echo of your
Presence rang
Throughout me and I
Felt guilty again
In the web of my feelings
I was caught
It still feels like my fault
That you’re not here
Even though you
Are your own person
Your own being
I felt like your keeper
Like I failed at attempts
To protect you
Always thinking
There was one more thing
I could’ve done to
Retrieve you
From yourself
I miss you

Go

Plunge it in deep
So you can feel
How hard
You hurt me
It hurts
She hurt me
Love and let go
Curtsy after the show
A faithful friend
Wake up from a nap
Feel like I’ve been
Zapped as if
Something has died
I can’t remember
If I cried
My pride or
My hunger for life
Is it still here
I’m unsure what the
Words are to find
Look for joy
Don’t let friends
From the past
Destroy or
Rip away from you
The perfect choice
To move forward
With yourself
The key to
Believe in the
Future of
What possibilities
Are in store are
Awaiting you
In the wild or
On the dance floor
Missed kissed
Who knew that
My love
Could be resisted
There’s nothing
Left to recoil
Freed from the chains
The locks of pain
Floating away
Into the distance
Free to go

Appellation

I feel it deep
Inside my chest
Rummaging through
My anatomical toolbox
I found the rest
Central to my rib cage
So many parts
Around the gears
The joints the
Points connecting
Intertwining veins a
Warehouse for tears
Working churning
A memory factory
For feelings and
Blood red discerning
Volatile burnings
Swollen emotional
Dealings with time
And solace yearning
Tu me manques
Pressed into the clock
Back against the wall
Standing straight and
Tall like Big Ben
I found your name
On a piece of paper
Crumpled up
Tossed down my throat
I supposed like a well
Excited to tell or remember
To unfold it the ink
Was glowing there
Visible and dispelled
Feel at rest again
Heavy breathing
Then upon my chest
Your moniker stood
Living within my body’s
Domain imprinted
Safely until you arrive

52 Pickup

Throw ‘em up in the air
See where it falls down
Throw me up in the air
See where I fall down
Toss the cards into the sky
How does it all play out
Let the cards fall
Where they may
Close to your chest
Or far far away
Does chaos seek direction?
Why do we know
What the better thing
To do is and then
End up going in the
Opposite direction
Like 52 pickup
Cards in the air
See where they land
If your brain knows
How to follow the hand
Why backwards
Or just because to be fair
Same random
Possibility is torn
When the answer
Is so clear
Internal warfare
I don’t have the energy
To play a round of
Who’s got it worse
With you

Throw ‘em up in the air
See where it falls down
Last one home
Is a rotten egg
I’ll follow my gut
Skip the fight nor to drown
With my head

Want Ads

Looking to cry over
Somebody new
Looking to feel my
Heart beat out of my chest
Somebody new
Looking to feel the flutters
Coursing through my veins
Somebody new
Looking to protect you
From spiders and mice
Looking to hold you
When nothing feels right
Somebody new to
Comfort in the night
Someone to get my hopes up
For even if it means
You can’t be there all the time
Whatever you want to do
I can make plans too
Somebody new to
Make out with buy gifts and
Splurge on trips and shit
Missing a time for us
To embrace you when you’re down
Missing a time for us to laugh
When there’s no fun to be found
Somebody new to
Text with and wait for
Your response
Somebody new to
Look forward to
Seeing on the weekends
Hanging with some evenings
You can have your life
Keep what makes you happy
Somebody new to add to you
Get on with the grafting
My heart is giant
My love is big
The season’s changing
So make a wish
If you’re looking for somebody
To protect you and pull through
Here’s my number
Call or text me anytime
I’m looking for you too

Drugs

Your aspirations were so slow
Barely driven but to be fair
Generally most people
Are completely unaware
Growing up I wondered am I
The only one who noticed this
I needed your help, I felt your love
Keeping me alive goes without
Saying but anything more is extra
What could cause someone
To want more for their child
Than the bare minimum
Does the mission to have them
Grow up to become what they
Will as the best versions
Of their little selves whom you
Created full of possibilities
Fall short when you want so
Very little for yourself or for
Them as well… we didn’t need
Celebrity but we certainly
Could have done better than
What we did believe me
I have so much more to give
So as an adult I continue to
Work toward the best thing I
Could possibly be with the
Limited time that I have and
We would have had so much more
If your desire to see me succeed
Was part of the plan to believe
In my capabilities as an artist
As a potential human
Would eventually become
With your encouragement
We could have had
More than we did
If you wanted more than
The way you chose to live
Like drugs