poetry – Page 33 – Poétique

Slide

When your friends hate your success
Despise your willingness to keep going
To tick boxes of efforts you strive to
Conceive shifting circles shedding by
Everything in between old friends
Watching you attain the dreams they
Have yet to achieve triggered to see you thrive
It’s gruesomely quiet in a desirable way
Although he couldn’t stop himself from
Wanting worse for others than good
Makes them smile to see you fail
A fire is shot into thin air by way
Of dissatisfaction and fear an elevation
To adhere to the greatest principle
Ingrained within we learn to love them
At a distance and keep summiting on
To the top of the mountain and then
Back down and of course back up again
Don’t let them win or suck you down
Into their pits of grotesque despair
Let go to feel closer to your true self
Walk through the pile that’s placed
Before you to hold you back from
Your evolvement indeterminatly
Although she could not stop herself from
Secretly despising all the capabilities
I was not able to hide from my talents
My gifts my considérâtes all the happiness
That my grandmother built in me
All the encouragement that I was taught
To be with affectations of kindness
And mystical wisdom I have found
It is not always met with the same satisfaction
Adored with the same curiosities found
It is abhorred and coveted for by close
Friends and relatives that cannot grasp
Their own abilities to become more or
Dive into their own creativities they must
Look to someone else and when they do
Resentment floats in like a dark cloud
That’s what slides are for

Lowkey

All the stories being told inchoate
Until they hit my eardrums
Rumors swimming around about
What I said or who I am
Confrontation at its best in a
Circle of friends when the words
Being spoken are unfamiliar
But they are all about you
In a brutal and undeniable way
Sharing things about me
That were not mine and
Did not belong to me or my mouth
Defending ourselves against nothing
I could sense the love under her
White hoodie I could feel and see
A genuine smile in her eyes but everything
Being said about me behind my back
Was unreal and untrue should we
Take the knife from behind me am I bleeding?
My ears burning with fire
I knew none of it until it was being
Said in a place where no one was
Protected and here you stand tall
This is the place to be reminded
To defend your character what you’re
About who you identify as
It’s exhausting to prove yourself
And I gathered this is why I
Choose to live alone without
All the commotion of another
Back and forth’s of many others
A tranquil peace of disbelief
So easy to misplace and to forget
The quick regret of being roommates
An abrasive reminder to yourself
How to respect the solitude
Before you jump into a spacecraft
Full of alien behaviors without
Investigating first all the dynamics
When I awoke and found myself
In bed alone, a sigh of relief
Washed over me how I love being
Capable having the ability to
Connect but oh how much
I relish the opportunity to be
At rest within myself lowkey
Harmonious and placidly away
From argumentative confusion
Permanently eyes open with
Awareness to be freed
It’s just a dream

Dreamscape

Waiting for the train to come in
An amalgamation of hope and
Broken cookies that I baked
Early this morning still soft
And a little bit warm for you
People pass by without noticing
I could be any insect standing here
Holding down the sidewalk with the
Hustle bustle of commotion
Lots of comings and going’s
Shadows of light cast down by
A sun that is happy to be alive again
Another day with cold winds that
Blow in multiple directions I can
Almost feel levitated in this climate

My head was throbbing from
A bandwidth of overthinking what
All outcomes and scenarios might
Be leaving me at the edge of a bed later
Or standing alone in the shower
Though my desire to fulfill all my
Curiosities about you by way of what
Next year and the future of the
Streams of many different kinds
Of feelings could opt to start a brigade
With my pulse leaving me ready
In every way to find out more about
Who you are as the engineer pulls in
A final puff of smoke blows out

I am looking eyes peeled to see
If you’ll be exiting the car to walk the
Dirt road back to ours and discover
Everything you want to share about
Whatever kept you going all these years
The sun has risen higher in the
Sky now the altitude has changed
A bird is preening its tattered feathers
A fool’s paradise in a delusional dream

Current UTC

I can hear the crows through the fog
But I can’t see them
Just the highlights of things
One cloud is glowing like the sun
Where it must be hiding
It’s not the way you look
It’s who you are inside
I overheard the grass in a whispering
Conversation to the trees
Gold bath of liquid on my face
Glass hand blown ancestral blue
Artifacts glistening like diamonds
Crystal white bowl half pieces
Laid out on the table of my mind
My want is healthy and strong
So I desire them all
To know every piece and its symbolic meaning
Layers of mist on the skin
Sprinkle a fountain of youth
Falling from above and all around
There is a keeper standing before us
Know the roles before you enter
He says plainly with his eyes
Never opening his mouth
Assess the position of mental foreplay
I am ready to engage with
Whatever psychological experience
Is about to unfold as naively as an infant
No boundaries or knowledge
For offending just open
Who is who what is what
And when goes where will soon
Be answered but first I will quench
My thirsty lips that have been blinded
By the brume with dusty vapors
As I part the curtains of reality
In the membrane of my cortex
To expose the untamed world to my
Need for shouting my deepest
Unheards my tragic left behinds
My gnashing pearls for teeth that
Need to speak the unspoken beautifully
Emptying out the heart
Let it drain onto the floor
Clean the mess up later
Allow the infrastructure to be
Rearranged and feel the peace
Of not knowing grab hold of this for
The universe upholds no human time
A clock unwinds

Veritas

Wrapping my head around new feelings
How much can I hold onto my own
Cerebral functioning in the presence
Of another who gives me want for
Emotions outside of my own self
My body is swollen with love
I have so much more to give after
Time spent being in such a presence
I believe we could solve the riddle
Of life together you are as strong
Or stronger than me consciously
I turn to you I agree I listen I bow
In empathy I believe you behold the
Answer before me I hear you listening to me
What is the difference between
Passionate love and friendship radiating
They are very different but somehow
Feel the same both traveling through
The body like a surge of electric joy
Likened to an energy boost from a drink
Although intangible it can be felt
He knelt before the moment to behold
It in its glorious wit and charm but
Also felt disarmed by his own mistrust
Not comprehending what the journey
Could become or wise for letting it unwind
On its own unraveling tenderly soft
And quiet because the trumpet he heard
Was loud and boisterously calling out to say:
“Don’t miss the chance like you always do!”-
But there was no need to rush or fumble
Where were we all going to anyway?
As if an apocalypse was heading fast
To hit our town in a cluster of
Asteroids but still nothing could stop the
Fussing or rushing to meet the moon and
Stars on time before the sun came up
One last chance to polish the throne
To stand at the foot of truth and still
Beg to be understood no not even then
For the question of love and friendship
Left him in a chaotic frenzy of ecstasy hoping
A fragment of foresight and wisdom
Would fall down from a crack in the sky
By way of Aletheia daughter of Zeus
She would definitively know what to do
Even when the earth shakes we still
Come out of the quakes wondering

Amazing

Aching to feel if I’m amazing
With flowered eyes that want
To come out from behind the mask
My psyche is cooking up a
Breakfast of reminders not to
Forget about the work and
Art performance of existence
What mask will you put on today
To present to the world that you are
Somehow amazing and different
Sequins and bunny ears strapped on
My face opalescent roses hooked at
The top of a cross diamond vest
Off-white terry cloth pants with
Mexicain pom pom garland or a
Suit and tie one with a panther
Catches my eye is that a tattoo
Of a kiss on my face or just makeup?
Or did someone actually
Leave that there for me to find later?
Maybe we wear them all together
I’m in a hurry I’ve got wheels
On my shoes but somehow the
Sound reminds me of slick bottomed
Chukkas or oxfords sliding down the
Multi-angled hallway with the momentum
A pair of superior woven dress socks
Might give you if you are rushing
To meet everyone in the building
And get back to the appointment
That you’re late for but also dancing along the way
Feeling like you’ll arrive just in time
To make everyone happy, they’re waiting!
Sophisticated and savvy
Satisfying them all dressed to the nines
But who are we when we are
Doing it all and which mask
Will I put on today?
Aching to feel if I’m amazing

Blindsight

To be sexy does it mean then
That we have to be seen?
Is it the voice? Does the body matter?
Do we have to view one another
To be attracted to each other?
Could I step into a room
Eyes closed hear the tone
Assess the energy sense you?
Could the fragrance of your skin
Be enough to know if we are
Simpatico and if so would
Seeing you take away from
Every ability to know that we
Are a perfect match because
My eyes would sketch a judgement
Of my attraction to you
Much faster than my other
Sensory if I was blindfolded
Isn’t that the extreme to see
If compatibility is all in the
Soul of the beholder…
If ever we chance to blindside
What rules would we need
To put in place to tick the things
That are an absolute must
If it wasn’t based on appearance
If we were talking heart to heart
Human to human could we
Find one another in a room
With nothing but us
Flowers on the grave
For the lovers we lost
Inescapably because we
Only got to know their face
First not their hearts

Second Guessing

Caught up in the druthers
Did we take it too far
Or just not far enough
I could be a lot less afraid
If you think the ocean’s deep
You should see my eyes
When they’re looking back
At you into your everything
Not too fast not too slow
Feels pretty expressive
Conveying how we feel
To one another sometimes
Even without words
Picking up on your signals
Attempts in sharing this
Experience with others to
Figure out somehow
What you were saying
If what I saw was real
If I leave it alone or
If I continue to share the story
And find out that
I should go back or
That I missed the first
And last chance or even more
That it didn’t matter really
Whatever we choose to
Spend time thinking about
How much what didn’t happen
Actually matters

Outside

I love the way the light glistens
From the artificial lamps
Outside after it rains on the
Black asphalt canvas
Every which way you turn your
Head is a different spectacle
Like the dark matter of the
Universe is looking back at you
Listening for the low hum
In the backdrop of fall morning
Wields a faint ocean-like roar
As if a lion is hiding around the
Corner waiting to devour us
Blinking lights in the distant sky
Remind me of taking a trip
To Thailand of course this
Could also be extraterrestrial
I’m not opposed as every morning
Coagulates a new planet and
A new beginning somewhere
There are dark moments
That dance with me in the
Coming attractions of
Celebrating the unknown
Inaudible messages

Wilted

I remember I was so angry
You could cut the tension
In the room with a machete
It would have been easier
Just to move on but I
Already felt so discounted
By you
I always thought someone
Or something would get in
The way knowing we would
Have our Ursula and I was
Shown in some other worldly
Way that the truth was coming
I had no way of knowing
It would be through me and
Not through you but
When a scissor comes to cut
The ceremonial rope
It doesn’t care what the
Ends are tied to
Not like we did
Not like I did

Not like we knew…
Treachery to be gilded past
And hesitations that were
At long last the end of the
Line that was thrown out
Into the abyss never foretelling
That the end was always waiting
To begin when the riddle of the
Pools of purple black and magenta
Swirled beneath us like a
Sinkhole in the sea of our
Once hoped for destinies