poetry – Page 35 – Poétique

Line by Line

Is it impatience that’s the culprit
What should get us into trouble
Or people who do not follow through
To help as they desired to would?

Could we not wait a moment longer
If we have prolonged this entire time?

Watch my heartbeat race and
My pulse go up when I see her name
The trauma is real reaction deliberate
This cannot be faked well knowing
I am a sensitive but bad at closing
The gate because people pleasing
Is ingrained in my nature

Relier les points un par un
Dig into the meaning and
Get the job done!

I love the way the sun falls down here
Lizards and birds are almost friendly
Even the tiniest mourning dove
Seems differently sweet and I
Crave nothing more than to rescue
The rocks that are mortared here
Each piece put in place
Is more outstanding than
Anything I’ve ever aligned
It all portends well to become
A stronger skeleton when roasting
The oven is hot and the food
Is nourishing even the dragonflies
Are delighted in knowing that life is not
Broken like love, it can exist anywhere
On the planet if it’s wanted

Evaluation

Fighting to thrive
To make something of this life
I feel it burning from beneath
And still I cannot seem to reach
The truth that says
In conclusion
“You are not alone.”

Appearing that I feel
As if I’m not doing enough
In order to protect
Any mental rebuff
I create a shield
I form a barrier
Is it running away…
Am I avoiding the terror?
What of not growing!
If I cannot stay
Have I delayed the inevitable

Early childhood
Was tumultuous too
Later years I have
Tried to protect myself
Eliminate what can permanently
Hurt yet am I not growing
In this way if I reject
Do not allow myself
The exposure to the pain
Stand up and face it
Lay down and take it

Evoking experiences in
Perceptions that resonate

Do it because you love it
Not because it gives you
Grief or pins you down
In misery that’s what
I was taught by my grandmother
She wore a very special crown
Until I am vaporized
And deplete
Like the rest of us
What more can we do
However we play the harpsichord
We must all go

Light falling through the idle
Window pane and the wind
Conducts an orchestra
Of grass and palm outside
If but to comprehend
Even one speck

Swimming

Think straight the earth is
Moving underneath you
Things won’t always be stationary
Climb through the vines
Pass through the jungle
On your way we find
The most powerful revelations
Are still in store for us
To discover

We cannot uncover what is
Left to be found if we are
Stuck in the same place
On the ground and still
We need a rock to call home
Something to come back to
How do we then
In what way is it possible
A nomadic civilization
Sounds appealing but
We are creatures of habit
A necessary nature for
Routine a mole in a home

Home is where the heart is
I have been told
And our hearts are in our breasts
Last I checked
But how then do we find
The meaning meant our
Ancestors left for us
To open up the doors
Where hidden chimes
Ring this unquestionable
Answer to the footsteps
Of our lives?

Promises

Have you ever made a promise
That was only a dream?
Imaginations that we wish
Would come true and in that moment
You are swept away with an
Impossible possibility to conceive
I tend to sink very deeply
Into people mostly all the way
There isn’t a lot that I don’t
Feel comfortable getting in or
Close to even if it means
All the work will disappear
From beginning to know you
From vulnerability and fear
If it’s a fantasy of promises
Then let it be like science fiction
To both of us because to be close
You have to actually be there
Not just standing at the edge
Of the water throwing a bottle
With a message hoping it will
Arrive at its destination or even
Into the hands of your beloved
Sometimes a promise is a dream
If not to purée our feelings and
Drink them we must feel them
Out loud even if they cannot
Become true in the end
Imagination how silly
To go around smelling
Daffodils and lilies
Oh how I wish

Coupling

Smart people can
Arrive at their own
Conclusions if you will
What is this trickery to be had?
Look let’s be honest
I’m not even sure
That you like me
The beasts have been
Unleashed and
We are running through
A darkened wood
Can you hear the howl
Of the wolves that
Cry to be close
To your throat
And would you offer it?
Give it up to be
Hanging free from
The invisible domain
Of shattered dreams
Broken memories and
The mysterious mist
Of uncommon truth
If I’m wrong then
Someone send a
Harbinger to
Check in on me
Follow the shape
Of the wind
Listen to the sound
Of the distant rhythm
Silent wings
Birds hiding in the trees
Lips whispering
Hopes unseen stab
Aimlessly at the dark
In an effort to strike a
Balance with me in the
Absence of light a thornless
Bed of roses spread out
The heart has lain down
With the courageous embrace
In a coupling of tomorrow
Beneath a mossy blanket

Fault

It still feels like
It’s my fault
There’s no coming back
From the loss of a loved one
Just moving forward
Sitting at the edge
Of my bed
Not in any way
Purposely thinking back
A trigger a shot
There you are
Something climbs into
My head to remind me
Of the things that we did
When we were kids
Was it something I touched?
I can’t remember what
Tripped it but the sound
Of your memory
The echo of your
Presence rang
Throughout me and I
Felt guilty again
In the web of my feelings
I was caught
It still feels like my fault
That you’re not here
Even though you
Are your own person
Your own being
I felt like your keeper
Like I failed at attempts
To protect you
Always thinking
There was one more thing
I could’ve done to
Retrieve you
From yourself
I miss you

Go

Plunge it in deep
So you can feel
How hard
You hurt me
It hurts
She hurt me
Love and let go
Curtsy after the show
A faithful friend
Wake up from a nap
Feel like I’ve been
Zapped as if
Something has died
I can’t remember
If I cried
My pride or
My hunger for life
Is it still here
I’m unsure what the
Words are to find
Look for joy
Don’t let friends
From the past
Destroy or
Rip away from you
The perfect choice
To move forward
With yourself
The key to
Believe in the
Future of
What possibilities
Are in store are
Awaiting you
In the wild or
On the dance floor
Missed kissed
Who knew that
My love
Could be resisted
There’s nothing
Left to recoil
Freed from the chains
The locks of pain
Floating away
Into the distance
Free to go

Appellation

I feel it deep
Inside my chest
Rummaging through
My anatomical toolbox
I found the rest
Central to my rib cage
So many parts
Around the gears
The joints the
Points connecting
Intertwining veins a
Warehouse for tears
Working churning
A memory factory
For feelings and
Blood red discerning
Volatile burnings
Swollen emotional
Dealings with time
And solace yearning
Tu me manques
Pressed into the clock
Back against the wall
Standing straight and
Tall like Big Ben
I found your name
On a piece of paper
Crumpled up
Tossed down my throat
I supposed like a well
Excited to tell or remember
To unfold it the ink
Was glowing there
Visible and dispelled
Feel at rest again
Heavy breathing
Then upon my chest
Your moniker stood
Living within my body’s
Domain imprinted
Safely until you arrive

52 Pickup

Throw ‘em up in the air
See where it falls down
Throw me up in the air
See where I fall down
Toss the cards into the sky
How does it all play out
Let the cards fall
Where they may
Close to your chest
Or far far away
Does chaos seek direction?
Why do we know
What the better thing
To do is and then
End up going in the
Opposite direction
Like 52 pickup
Cards in the air
See where they land
If your brain knows
How to follow the hand
Why backwards
Or just because to be fair
Same random
Possibility is torn
When the answer
Is so clear
Internal warfare
I don’t have the energy
To play a round of
Who’s got it worse
With you

Throw ‘em up in the air
See where it falls down
Last one home
Is a rotten egg
I’ll follow my gut
Skip the fight nor to drown
With my head