Spontaneity

He never used to be so structured
Like he couldn’t have a spontaneous
Phone call before just pick it up
Why must everything be so scheduled
A bad habit he acquired from some
Long lost friend along the way

My gawd just to have someone to
Do it with to share the bliss
For even fleeting moments to
Feel the light of exchanging in the thing
That you’re doing because it’s
So much more delicious than
To do it only for yourself
Even if it can be done

Stepping in and out of the garden
He could feel both the end and the
Beginning of something real that
Had already happened and was
About to again but the timeline
Inferred a lot of when when when
And the moments of waiting were
Written in the dictionary as
Inescapably endless

Capture confidence in each other
In the face of a rose and the sun
In your eyes when you smile
Although I’ve yet to see that while
All the evidence of a new tomorrow
Lands in the home of our beloved
Untold future which hangs under
A moon of passionate unknowns
A reverie for spontaneity

© GÄ

Rifling

Rifling through all the money
Gifts with intention
After the wedding but worse
No way to thank them
Once they were received
No names attached
All the cards on the floor
The world thought
She was wonderful
Of course I did too
But then sometimes
Only money mattered
Not who gave it to you

A better version of himself
Then even he was today
But all he could do was miss
What he couldn’t have
Which was the thing that
Wasn’t ever there
Some kind of made up
Situation in his head
Now that’s what you call
A true headache

Best self now is to
Make it over again but for
Him not for her
Self love?

The lights were low in the room
Friends coming and going
What’s next? Sex or more booze?
A night walk to a friends
Drugs were on the menu
We had the hotel so no rush
Building been in the ground
Since 1911 made it a sure thing

Funny engaged on one block
And married on the corner up
Years later small town
Finish the night and swoon
Back to the room
More love before bed?
Is that a question?
Maybe tomorrow
It didn’t feel like she knew
How to love him just yet

© GÄ

Unkind

They can’t defend themselves
The gentle and vulnerable sweet
Taking hope in the arms
Those who can’t stand
To love them completely
To defend them with their blood
Use your hands to protect them
From war
Don’t use your fists on them
Defenseless precious
You don’t know better beautiful creatures
The one who hurts them
Who can’t help their innocent ones
Is actually just a fool who
Deserves an award because
He was thrown into the pit of no return

Caress them and adore them
Make them feel good and calm yourself
Love is simple, don’t stand unkindly
Rude awakening
Cast laughter as love
Be kind to them and
Kind to yourself
Cool breeze hot summer
Complete rupture open heart

© GÄ

Uncover

It takes time to live life
To reclaim it and make it last
All the hours we give up
For what we loved and what is gone
It’s fast, but the building is slow
Kaleidoscopic shadows attached to
Pictures in our house hanging
From the walls of our hearts
The bell tower echoes
A lighthouse beam shines
White sand trickles
In the back of our minds, a clock
Ticking away like our youth
Counting cactus needles
Be an atlas detective
All the hidden parts
Yet to be discovered or
Uncovered anything
Underneath our skin
Ready to soar like a dove

© GÄ

Munchausen

Seems no matter my approach
She is broken to my words
She is absent to the world
Not just me

Climb through the cobwebs
With a different approach
Find your way in even if
It means that you arrive
Nowhere

Guard the back door with your life
There might be an inner fire
Under control

Histrionics or just dramatics
When I’m doing worse
She’s doing better
When I’m doing better
She’s doing worse
Like some munchausen spell
Deriving from what is a
Needless suffering or lack of
Sympathy for the abject reality
Of being alive, just a sorry kiddo
Is all you’ll get

Leading up to the
Constant replay betrayed by
Some kind of sorcery that
Keeps me ever returning to
Your oracle of death

© GÄ

Surface

You can ask a million times
They’ll say “okay”
But it never gets done
Disrespect the considerations
Burn the grass drink your life away
Leave the air filled with
Their audacities

Behavior that is begging for
Cremation or non existence
Nothing left to live for or
Care about so the neighbors
Just continue on this way
How can you care when
You have so little to be concerned about?
I’m the anomaly in the equation

Close my eyes play the guitar
Sing myself to sleep
Maybe ask the moon
If he has any secrets to keep
Let my voice shake
Let the worst melt through
Into the cracks between
The bed and the wall

One more time we can
Collect all the memories and
Stuff them into a tin can
Give it a kick and see
Where it lands

Happy tears
Tired years and an answer
At the end of the hall
Glowing wonder
Ask a favor
Hope the better end
Works its way up
To the surface

© GÄ

Dust

I’m different in relationships
She said without warning
Maybe we shouldn’t then?
I asked myself not knowing
What it meant for us

Once lovers once friends
Twice lovers again
Buy a record to forget
To care what it means
Wait to open it to listen
With someone who cares
Lingering in the background

No trumpet on a hill
No horn echoed from a
Mountain to shake the ravines
Could answer for what’s left
Kissing the grass with
Dust from the moon
Peeled fleck by fleck
Landing on my face
At half mast I swear
It was full yesterday
What is time anyway

If giving up a friendship
Is what was meant for
Us to trade I would’ve
Kept you as a friend
Instead of giving it away

© GÄ

Soak

It’s a deep soak or a
Casual underlining of
Nuance euphemistically speaking
All of us forgetting each other
I live as if I could die tomorrow
How do you live?

Baby grains and wheat stains
Rolled out into a papyrus
To record the memories
Unforgettable dreamscapes
That feel like reality
Questionably so

Trying our best at a cakeless walk
But still seeking the sweet
Holding out to be glued to
Temporary existence
In an eternity

What time is it anyway
It won’t matter who
After they forget you

© GÄ

Miséricorde

To be a participant in life
Not always driving
Sit back and take it in
Be not contained
By the desires of others
Fight for your exit

Red lines drawn down
Electric eyes up
Irascible prone to
Temperamental outbursts
Like a burning fire
Sadness always on the horizon
Little did I know that genuine
Happiness was always
Around the corner

Like a wet towel you
Can’t get out from under
Breathing in wet
Breathing out wet
With what we have left
How much more
Can the body take
What is resilience
If nothing exists
To feel love?

Just to stretch our legs
Walking the distance to
Get onto the other side of
Emotions we were never aware
That we were suppressing

Solve the mystery and mercy
Embrace the light that was
Once blanketed by those who
Needed to put it out

© GÄ

Point Manquer

Well you missed one, he said
You let some people down
So what
Won’t be the first
Can’t be the last
If you’re living

Alright I will carry on
Seek the distance, more thoughts
From a bird’s eye view
I helicopter over myself
Manifest a picturesque
Moment in feeling
Being perfect and
Acceptable no matter
What happens are we
Meeting in the mind
With the self?

We’re supposed to take care
Of each other what’s so distracting?

I have tons of energy for
The things I want to do
And zero energy for the
Things I don’t

See
See yourself
Blind to the outside view
Mirror, mirror show me the truth
I’m no mortician but the grief
Is real

© GÄ