Poétique

Who We Are

We only pretend to be friends
So it’s not weird if we don’t
And from the outside looking in
Everyone believes that we’re friends
The truth hurts

We only give in because we need
Certain things but it’s true
If I had to assume you would be there
I know not to rely on you
That’s real

I feel better knowing that I lie
In hopes of how you are behind
My back and fake tears that are cried
Because I don’t have to wonder
If you have plans

My heart says keep it to yourself
I feel the opposite behind your mirror
I sense that you respond completely
And antithetically to me
That’s just you

I could drink to kill the pain or to
Forget that you’re insane but then
I’d just wake up again to face
The ultimate fact of the matter
It’s just who we are

No Clue

There is a cat a dog and a bird that accompany me
They remind me of how much life there is to love

Each has their own voice and here I attempt to find my own
The glare of the past shadows their sweetness

I’m living a life that I could be taking for granted
My inner voice asks if I remember how I got here

A bright but grey morning inspires a joy that begs to be lived before noon
Even if it’s impossible
The smell of pines firs and fragrant needles reminiscent to heaven

Swirl around back and forth between my ears which are too busy listening
To notice
If a thunderstorm should shake the earth thoughts would form dreamscapes

I could have wished for this before the alien ship dropped me off

Chosen family a beautiful garden and all the music

What do we know about where we came from!? The clouds above form shapes that answer questions to who I am

But still nature appears to know more
If I could have picked this life to live before I was born into it
I would have chosen you even though I have no clue to your appearance

I would look for you in the hammock chair reading outside in our private garden
A completed picture
The necessary part that shares the memory I can’t look back on
Without you in it

If you can’t have your way
You disappear
Am I like that?
Do you want to punish
People around you
By taking away your love?
Am I like that?
Do you gain anything
By refraining from
Sharing your love?
Showing up for someone
In a capacity that is
Selfless and greater
Than the best you
Give yourself
In my assessment
You give yourself nothing
By taking away
Burning your plane
Crash and your going down
In flames by proving your
Point or is your point to
Remind me that you
Have no point to prove
Because you’re not
A pencil however
If you had one would you
Write me a letter?
Would you show me every word
Or would you erase some
Of what you feel
Am I like that?
I want to tell you everything
There are no second chances
No closure can be found
If we’re living on no man’s ground
I’m not like that

About It

Along the coast of memories, a
Mindful plot, the heart dances
In between the light, a palm,
Orange horizons and sand
Heart releases the past into the salted sea
Now hours of weeks and months
Break free into floating miracles until
The current can thrust and pulse alone
While each are reasonably intertwined
Outflowing as the crystal moon predicts
Dusk cradles crested love
Liberation from telephone wires

Neologism

I am sitting
With the lights on
In the dark
Like no one’s home
Without the spark

I did not know
The words could be
So simply said
You want to forgive
What the soul
Puts to bed

An extremely large flock
Of Sandhill Cranes form
A migration around the
Grounds of our wintering
Remains with absent gains
Hearts very high in the sky
Of abysmal memories

Cascades of deeper rusty
Blackened echoes and
What was said
Handing in the fin
Hanging on the edge
Of our ozone
Left to recount what
Breathing on a couch makes
Good for dreaming

I Wonder

How many times did you
See me when I wasn’t looking?
How long are you gonna keep
It to yourself?
You still continue to
Refuse to make it better
You excel at that
Not just with me
But like with EVERYONE
You did me bad
No remorse in your smile
Par for the course
Of course
Why did I have to
Find out this way
I guess I’m glad you lied
About the forever friendship
Part of the story
You could have just
Told me that you’re no fun
Surly disheartening
No more restarting
All that is left is the
Disorienting likes
On posts of things
You seem to care about
More than a few words
Or simply reaching out to me…

Loving Cup

Encomium lighthouse
I want to praise you
A bolt of lightning
Gorgeously strikes asunder
Ghastly love in broken parts
Put back together
Am I having a failure
Depression of sorts?
Where is my brief moment
Of emotional shorts?
My excitement
My frisson
My passion is living
Anything for a weird life
If it means climbing
Up a fire escape to
Get to you
If it means
Sliding down a fifty foot pole
To rescue you
Is my brain now in twain
Am I going insane?
Is there any excuse that
Could help bring me closer
To the truth that is us
With my neck tilted back
Facing up
You will find that my eyes
Are on watch to be
Filled to the brim
With your loving cup

Grandpa

He was dimming
His light flickering slow
Companion to a single Rose
This man of impossible gain
A confident cowboy who knew his domain

Guided with words that encouraged
So many his absence made glow
With the touch of one hundred sweet angels
In one finger this man did bestow

A grandfather naturally so
A father who truly took hold
A king in the light of ten thousand white owls
Does he stand in the midst of one soul

I look to my left to the willow
To the fruit of a neighboring tree
Over my shoulder the clouds floating by
Are strangely familiar to me

Tears streaming I can finally breathe
My own smile imparts waves of relief
Knowing you’ll always be close
His touch is in all that I see
In everything that I am your love
Will live on inside me

Charge!

Do it for yourself
Do it now
Tomorrow is too late
You are right on time
And whatever you do
Don’t second guess yourself
Because the night
Belongs to lovers
Caring too much
Creates trouble
Not caring enough
Can have the
Exact same effect
Except times double

Lie

Why would I lie to myself
If I know what the truth is
If I know that it’s useless
I would rather be toothless
Then pretend that it’s
Too late to have fun again

Why would I lie to you too
If I know the true meaning
Of what not make believing
Can do for the heart when
We’re willing to part with
All of the things that keep us
From living the life that
Could rip us apart

Open up the best part that
True love from the start
Can prevent all the hurt that
Is pushing us down
Time to put on your crown
Wear your beautiful truth
Why pretend to be something
You’re not

The most miraculous piece
Takes me down to my knees
Knowing I can be loved
Have you holding my hand
For the person I am truly
Loving you too babe like you’re
Wanting me to because fake
Will not prove anything
But to lose all the love that
We have if we trust in a lie
Knowing the truth
That we have is the best

So why would I lie
If I know what the truth is
If I know that it’s useless
I would rather be toothless
Then pretend that it’s
Too late to have fun again

Here’s to being with you babe