Anodyne

He laid down to hold her
Like mourning a ghost
You could hear the walls howl
And her wife begged him to
Understand that she meant well
But his heart was broken and
Was screaming in his dreams
Or was it just the sound
Of a past that they all
Promised to love one another
But no matter how hard he
Tried to love her it would
Always be on her terms and he
Was keeping his pledge to do so
Making it difficult to feel loved
In return conditionally she had
Reservations and conversations with
Her mother and her lover
Her wife and every other
He always wanted to be
As important as they but never
A replacement just to
Matter as much but
There was nothing
To kill the pain just
Mourning the apparition
As he spooned her on the floor
Of their past a memorial
To friendship and love
And how he had indeed
Honestly lost her

© GÄ

Empty Room

Mattress in an apartment
Building not completely
Abandoned but certainly
Left behind defenestrate
Hells bells holding on
By a windowsill

Just a bit of chocolate
Could bring out my best Superman
Why is she hunting me down
Pheromones heightened
Scent of a lover or
Leftover shudders

Obviously something there
Flowers in the courtyard
Down below the whistling
Of a passerby and a possibility
Dry heat dry hump
Clothing pressed against me
Breathe deep long and wide

How did we get here anyway
It’s all so confusing yet
Laying here looking at the ceiling
Somehow I’m glad that
It happened

Are we bad or is this good?
The stoics would say it’s neither
I can hear river music in my head
Too many things to do
Before we’re dead
Many reasons to keep alive
A mattress, you and me
And an otherwise
Empty room

© GÄ

Infuriations

She was the cat that would scratch
A true bitch to the end!
Just a little corn to wet your whistle
Oil your joints and snap you back
Not too many now you know
Could make it harder to keep living
Words or other phrases
Dangling earrings and hymns
On the front porch
Give a stretch and a yawn
Beginning to hold onto the ideas
That maybe we could make
Something if these furies
Wait for the cows to come home
Guess the more we say the
Less there is to be talking about later
Wouldn’t want to lose sleep
Over it but it does feel good
Seeing as the right thing is said
After a long wait for a good time
Or a cuddle under the milky way

© GÄ

Fulfill

To be strong in the vulnerability of
Our honesty is what matters most
Making the actions you take
Not a sin or a crime but a choice
That somehow hurtles you out of
Some self sacrificing pity and into
Another realm of respect in the
Eyes of those that love and adore you

When the lightning flashes
Brightening your surroundings
Like a tournament of heartbeats
Pounding stronger one more than
The other and then the pulse of
A sky illuminated by the silver
Moon is found highlighting the truths
Where will you be if there is
An unimaginable genuineness
Holding you in its charms

What ecstasy if not for vibrant
Realizations that could free us up
Mental clouds that leave us stranded
Deep in the weeds of luscious prairies
No longer growing to push back but
Yet to offer supple fruits and grains
For the wildlife that remain there with
Beguiled rains on the horizon isn’t there
A chance that we all might fulfill
Some solo meaningful propose to a dream…

© GÄ

Digging

Mirror mirror make love to me
White bow tie naked or otherwise
See the boys and girls at the gym
Checking themselves out
And all the people having relationships
Not just with themselves
But with the internet
Apps and worse
The anti human curse
Standing in the garden
I think of these words
All the folks we used to write letters to
Or take the time to say I love you

In person

Make a call meet up or play
They probably wrote me off today
Thought I was a billionaire
Someone who just didn’t care
About feelings not even my own?
But in the depths I know they
Wonder what’s been going on
Miss the time we spent upon
History we made to tell the
Stories that we knew so well
Later on in life as we got older
We’re here now, we’re here!!

Where are you?

But if you’re gone away
It doesn’t matter anyway
Why? What’s the point of caring
Life is short I bet you never thought
We’d ever lost our way into a
Paradox where the internet
Opens a scope to spy and check in
On each other meanwhile
Never to converse never to
Be sure because it’s pictures
And that’s all it is words without
The beating heart behind our lips
And it’s a trip to believe we could
All settle for this one day
Which is now looking in the mirror
At yourself do you see the person that you
Hoped you turned out to be or just AI?

The internet is repeating itself

© GÄ

Jars

Half ass trash means
Love in the present
Let go of the past

Mentality is everything
In the age of when we
Discover our maturity and
When we have yet to know
The difference but how?

The lines are drawn with arrows
On both ends that suggest in
Both possible directions
More anger less love
Bigger heart swelling
Isn’t that the point?

Contained frustration asking
For help when it’s easy
And it makes it harder
How did it get so strained
All for the sake of love
Or something like it…

You want someone to
Feel feelings for you
Don’t you!
Wouldn’t that be easier?

Sacrifice or reparations
Force you to abandon me
So we can find peace in
Each other again
Hanging upside down
In a ferris wheel or
Maybe just trying to
Catch lightening bolts
In mason jars

Either way then or now
It’s electric

© GÄ

Runaway

He says she’s amazing
So he can remind himself
It was a good choice to
Be with her id est marry…

Pedestal to chant everyday
Into bankruptcy for affection
Whatever you say dear
Was something
Better than nothing?

Laughing she placed
Her hands around his throat
Ready to choke the life out
Truculent at its utmost
Super physical

Let’s get it over with
She beckons him to the bed
But really wants to finish
Before it’s started
Sex is irrelevant to her
Close to dead

A bigger star
A bigger sun
Can be won

Frame it as an opportunity
To learn what true love
Can become after the storm

© GÄ

Lostfun

He came home to their fun
With nothing left in the barracks for me
The counter was empty a mess of
Impossible promises and vacant
Connections for me to pick up
On the floor after we closed the
Door behind us no father to bear
Just the two of them bonding as usual
He couldn’t keep up with their
Banter or whatever was the spark
That ignited between them that was
Hard to describe in words
Wanting to join in he found himself
Pushing for another way
Illegal or other wise to play catch-up
But there wasn’t any just
The evidence of a time where
It was easier to get the things
One would need to throw
That kind of a Mister Irresponsible party
No more of that now just a clean
Collar and whatever will be
Left in the trappings of tomorrow
Dark circles worn eyes what
Drunkard goodbyes could
Only relate to if but only
To have one more hip hip hooray
Sometime in winter

© GÄ

Beforehand

Oh no. Now you won’t think
I’m amazing anymore
Was my behavior flagrant
Who could tell but his insides

She was my secret weapon
And my worst enemy

Would you have cared
If she resented you
In the way mine did me?

Should our lovers resent us?

I just wanted to be your friend
To somehow empower you
Find a sidewalk that never ends

Not trying to become a billionaire
And if I was, not at the expense of others
Rich with friendships perhaps
That’s a wealth to be happy for

The longer we know each other
A better possibility to deepen
Connection and also the more it
Can hurt when she says
I already have a person
Even if you were only
Best friends once upon a time

© GÄ

Intimating

With so much healing
To be done could it be
Accomplished in the same lifetime
Finding the hours to start again
Move in from the past
Are we sulking does it show?
Is it deeply foreshadowing
What might forsake
Unprecedented possibilities
That were intended for all
That was procured in us?

Say less
Say less
Say less

Intimating that it were possible
There’s not enough money
In the world to step on our love
Incomparable fevers and
Countless cash under the mattress
Whatever you find, you can
Have it all

Say more
Say more
Say more

All I really want
Is your love

© GÄ